E=MC..Scared..?

This is probably one of the best mash ups I have ever seen, I mean holy shit dude, that is fucking funny! Well done unknown artist! I should take the trouble and use the power of the internet to find out said artist's name and give props, or I could just be lazy and say fuck it, post and be done. I am sure the occasional passive reader couldn't care less either. Well if they did, would it be enough to chide me in the comments section? To which my response would be something akin to a dog getting it in the snout when he peed on the rug. Peed on the fuckin' rug. So much for tie'n the room together. Then again, a meme is viral in nature so...., well, it's like this.. do we need to hunt down the first person to spread the flu? I think not. Stay freaky my friends!

You don't Say?!

Today your Captain brings you more weird shit from the interweb! Yea, like I have the market cornered on that! For me it is just more eye popping madness found as I sojourn across the cyber sea from all destinations of oddity. We can safely say that this old bat took the 'Brown Acid' back at Woodstock and simply never returned from that trip. One of Timothy Leary's ever faithful who bought into the expansion of consciousness and refused to grapple with the boundless and harsh realities around all of us. Enjoy your ride Granny, I am sure one day I'll run into you on Venice Beach or somewhere in Greenwich Village. Maybe even at Burning Man for that matter. That is, if I ever get my mitts on the cash for a Winnebago, fuel, supplies and lots of good drugs to chase after my elusive personal American Dream.

And then, there was this guy.

Somewhere along the line, things went down hill for Popeye. Once a mighty sailor of the seven seas, now reduced to a carnival sideshow attraction. It seems his bloated forearms have migrated up to where the're suppose to be. A sad side effect from Spinach Abuse seems to be blindness. I would sight the weight loss, but we can blame Whimpy for that, eating up all the hamburgers in sight. What a fuckin' bummer. So my friends, raise a glass, pop a pill, spark a doobie or what ever your flavor, to Ol Bug-eyes here in honor of his ultimate weirdness he brings to our increasingly mundane and dull society. Sure there is plenty of strange to be seen on the interweb, but how does it get there? Now days everyone has a camera in their pocket, which changes the game in my opinion. Back in the day, when someone did something out of the ordinary, it was forever ingrained into the observers memory, or by chance caught on the local news by some misfortune. Now, it seems that when a person is caught in the act, it is the sole purpose to have it go "viral".  To me, it feels not as genuine as it use to be. But, then again what do the fuck do I know!?

Holy Crapola!

I just realized how long it has been since I had a good opportunity to blog! Since fucking November!? Well, when in doubt, Go Ape!! Doobaleeabah!!Fear no true believers, I will have more madcap misadventures to reports and continue to sink to low levels of mediocrity for you Deckhands to enjoy. I just need to get my groove back, find my cool once more, bring the mojo I once had many moons ago. Sobriety tends to have a downer effect on the creativity for me anyway. As the great Gonzo journalist Dr.Hunter S. Thomson said once, " I don't advocate drugs, alcohol or insanity. It's just in my case, they worked."

More from the WTF Files!

I have absolutely no clue of what this strange creature is, mainly because I forgot to write what it was when I found the pic, so my bad. We can however speculate to no end to what this insect is. Sometimes you feel like a nut I suppose. In our speculation and conjecture, it is my hypothesis that some native tribes probably consider this a tasty snack to be served with other spiders and grubs from the jungle.  Either that or that is just one of those things a person sees while on a hallucinogenic substance whipped up by the tribe's Medicine Man. If that's the case, I can only hope that this bug imparts some sort of wisdom to the psyconaught on their journey of mental exploration as they plumb the depths of the mind. Good luck, and Godspeed. I certainly would not want to wake up to an army of these invading my campsite. They could be poisonous and bitey and I can not abide biting insects of any sort that crave the flesh of the human beast.

A Kerfuffle Over Lunch.

Have we not devolved as a species enough as it is? Kudos to you at Channel 19 News to have the journalistic courage to probe deep into the soul of a beloved sandwich favorite to discern if the peanut butter is not as cooperative with the jelly as we once thought, or is it the other way around? Or is it that the bread is white and not wheat?  Well listen here, taste does not lie!! You might as well say, that the Reese's company got it wrong too! Are we so paranoid of a culture where we go around accusing food because we can?  Both breads taste great! Hey, wait...after a closer look at the details, one might say, "Hey, Kent and Brunswick is in Canada Eh!" But I would call them on their shenanigans and say, no way man, look at the high and low temperatures  the are marked with degrees Fahrenheit not Centigrade, and anyone who knows anything, that Canada runs on the metric system and in fact uses Centigrade. KPH too, so, say if you bellied up to the counter at the local Ronnie Mac Steakhouse, you could probably get a Royale with Cheese. Unless of course the company that Lords over the fast food biz  with a yellow gloved iron fist demands all of it's franchises in North America use the term "Quarter  Pounder". I wouldn't put it by those clowns I'll tell ya. But, I digress. Those places are most likely counties in a State near you! Now, lets take a closer look at this nasty bread the person used to make this travesty of our loved PB&J. I would guess that it was found in some school kid's repugnant locker. No Wonder Bread was hurt in the construction of this masterpiece. (No Wonder Bread was used at all it seems!) I mean bottom shelf bargain brand doesn't look that bad, and the fool even took a bite! Yet, we must see to the heart  of this matter. It is my professional opinion that PB&J sandwiches are not racist. They are only delicious. As funky as the one pictured looks, it may taste just fine. ( Insert philosophical cliche here about books and covers and all that.)

It's a game of what if....

Now, if you are a stoner or even if you're not, one has to agree on how cool this would be to have in your very own personal Soul Clinic. Illuminate your self and your friends with this radiation free lounging equipment from your friends at the Tron Gallery! Nightlife has never been so bright. Can you imagine, listening to some mellow jams, kicking it surrounded by the soft under-glow, enjoying your relax of choice with friends, old or new. Being apart of the Human Element, engaging, the essence of conversation, the point/counter point of ideas shared and sustained in the very movement of the moment. Built within this perfection is revelation, epiphany, enlightenment. Wise thoughts fill the cup of the mind, that make one ponder  if siting on electronic furniture with drink in hand could be a bad decision considering that liquid and electricity do not mix and might just blast you through the fuckin ceiling. Always bad news especially if you live on a bottom floor apartment. All those sorry bastards living above would notice would be a momentary brown out and body busting up out of their floor!  Good way to ruin movie night. Where in the hell would be the off switch anyway? Not recommended for well lit areas of the home or office in any case. I would not be surprised if the seating remains toasty warm, unless of course we have discovered light without heat.